The Dance
by Nytel
Summary: There are only so many things you can do in space, and remembering is one of them. KL. Spoilers for Colonial Day and LDYB.


**The Dance**

Life after the settlement of humanity on New Caprica was boring, or at least that was the case for the few who remained in orbit around the planet. Commanding a near empty ship was tedious and it left Lee with a lot of spare time. At first he had used that time productively, but as the months passed by with no sign of the cylons, that changed.

When he wasn't on duty Lee could be found sitting in his quarters or walking the halls aimlessly, the whole time just thinking. The future was too bleak to contemplate, so more often than not his thoughts drifted to the past. Sometimes he would spend hours just remembering his childhood or his academy days. But his history was only so long and eventually his mind began to drift to more unsafe topics, such as Galactica's ex-CAG and his ex-best friend.

_Looking back on the memory of  
The dance we shared 'neath the stars above  
For a moment all the world was right  
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye_

He often found himself reminiscing over the events of Colonial Day the year before. Though in general, his mind tended to stray more to the dance. Kara had looked… he couldn't even pick one word to describe it, and that was probably what had had him tongue-tied that night. Beautiful, stunning, sexy, amazing… they were all words that fit, but at the same time none of them were quite right. He supposed that perfect would be the closest he could get to describing her.

She'd worn a dress… for him. The realization still caused a ball of desire to form low in his belly. There was just something about knowing that he was the motivation behind her actions that made him undeniably possessive to the point where all he wanted to do was take her back to the bunkroom and show her exactly what she did to him.

He even thought that he would have had that chance. When they were dancing, everything just seemed to fit. He'd never felt as good as when she was in his arms, the two of them moving in time to the music. If someone had pulled him aside that night and told him that in less than a year Kara would be married to another man and leaving the military, he would have laughed at their stupidity. Starbuck might be unpredictable at times, but she would never do that.

How wrong he would have been.

_And now, I'm glad I didn't know  
The way it all would end, the way it all would go  
Our lives are better left to chance  
I could have missed the pain  
But I'd have had to miss the dance_

If Lee had known how things would turn out, he doubted that he would have put his feelings on the line, not with inevitable heartbreak waiting for him. It would have been safer that way, not risking everything. He wouldn't have had to endure any pain, and that thought was very appealing. But then he would have had to miss the dance, the dance that meant more than anyone would ever know.

_Holding you, I held everything  
For a moment, wasn't I a king  
But if I'd only known how the king would fall  
Hey who's to say? You know I might have changed it all_

For the first time since the destruction of the colonies, everything had felt right. There was no lingering sadness, just the happiness and contentment that holding Kara brought. In that moment Lee had been the luckiest man in the entire universe. He had found what he'd been searching for his entire life, and the realization shocked him.

He had let someone else cut in. He only needed a minute to collect himself before he asked Kara to go home with him.

_And now I'm glad I didn't know  
The way it all would end, the way it all would go  
Our lives are better left to chance  
I could have missed the pain  
But I'd have had to miss the dance_

Letting her go had been the first mistake in a long string, and probably the worst one of them all. Nothing pained him more than the memory of going to cut back in and seeing her laughing and flirting with another man. It didn't even matter that it was Baltar; just that it wasn't him.

He was glad that he hadn't known how everything would go; how Starbuck and Apollo, and Kara and Lee would end. He would have chosen to forgo that hurt, to never know that detrimental soul-eating pain. But that would have meant missing out on the best moment of his life.

_Yes my life, its better left to chance  
I could have missed the pain  
But I'd have had to miss the dance_

The End


End file.
